toc
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Blue door in the medieval village of Les Arcs-sur-Argens (Var)
toc-toc
(tok-tok)
knock knock
Everything about Martine could be known by her knock: unhesitating, energetic, persistent. It was the kind of knock a policeman might use: "Toc-toc-toc! I know you're in there. Come out, come out!"
Though law-abiding, Martine was always on the run. "I passed by your house last night," she'd say, "on my way home from work. Your shutters were open so I closed them for you." I guessed she had figured out that my husband was away a lot on business and that I needed a reminder to lock up my windows for the night as the villagers do.
When Martine wasn't watching over my home, she was filling it. She brought the children strawberries from the farmers' market and she brought me fresh cabbage—then stayed to stuff and bake it.
"It's good, isn't it?" she'd say, of the stuffed chou. "You love it! It is delicious!" While I ate, she would set about reorganizing my frigo. "All of the condiments go here!" she'd say, gathering the ketchup and the pickles and the tapenade from the back of the fridge and placing them in the door compartments.
If I complimented her on her dress, she would straighten her five-foot frame, hold her head high, and raise her hand with a flourish. "Je suis belle, non? Just look at me! Bella!"
Her teeth, one slightly and charmingly bent over the other in front, were always showing, because her mouth was always smiling. She was Italian with a dark complexion, her hair was bleached light, her makeup heavy, and her figure—which she decorated with pride—somewhere in between. Martine did not have hang-ups or low self-esteem; she had no time to question or to second-guess. Like her knock—Toc-toc-toc! Come out, come out!—she was direct.
"Get in the car!" she ordered, when personal doubts had begun to consume me. Struggling as a young mother, an étrangère, and a wife, I decided I had nothing to lose by allowing this colorful new friend to steer me out of my tristesse.
Martine drove, speeding across the countryside and over a narrow bridge—edging so close to the guardrail that I shrieked, "Martine!" When I had recovered from the fright, I turned to my friend:
"How do you know you're not going to hit that rail? How can you judge so well?"
"Ce n'est rien! You just need to take driving lessons, know the size of your car—sois confiante!"
True, I thought, forgetting about the guardrail and remembering my earlier self-doubts. It was high time, now, to step confidently into some of the new roles that I had been given since moving to France. Wife, mother, French resident... the ability to fully carry out these roles was there, somewhere, inside of me. I just needed to let go of that guardrail and have confiance!
When we had cleared the bridge, Martine abruptly pulled the car over and reached past me to the glove compartment, from which she produced a folded piece of paper.
"Écoute bien," she said. "I am going to read you something...."
* * *
(In the next edition: the famous words Martine shared. Click here.)
YOUR EDITS PLEASE
Did you see any typos in this story? Thanks for pointing them out, here.
French Vocabulary
toc-toc-toc = knock knock knock
le chou = cabbage
le frigo = fridge
la tapenade = pureed olive spread
je suis belle, non? = I am beautiful, aren't I?
un étranger, une étrangère = foreigner
la tristesse = gloominess
ce n'est rien = it's nothing (it's easy)
sois confiant(e) = be confident
écoute bien = listen closely
la confiance = confidence
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Listen: Hear the word "toc" pronounced Download toc.wav
Quand une porte se ferme, une autre s'ouvre. When one door closes, another one opens. --Miguel de Cervantès
.
Expressions:
Toc, toc. Qui est là? = Knock, knock. Who's there?
et toc! = so there
il est un peu toc toc, celui-là = he's a little crazy, that one
Toc (noun, masculine) can also mean "trash, junk":
en toc = fake (gem)
C'est du toc = It's fake
Ça fait toc = It looks fake
Also, the capital letters 'TOC' stand for "troubles obsessionnels compulsifs" ("obsessive compulsive troubles").
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Words in a French Life - order it here.
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a lot not alot
Posted by: Jacqueline Butler | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 02:59 PM
Hello Kristin: two small typos
Fourth paragraph: back of 'the' fridge
Second paragraph: was away 'a lot' (two words)
Posted by: Sushil Dawka | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 03:07 PM
Thank you Jacqueline and Sushil!
Posted by: Kristin Espinasse | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 03:10 PM
Hey, it looks great. The only comment I have is about: "It's good, isn't it?" she'd say, of the stuffed chou. "You love it! It is delicious!"
I'm not sure what your intention was with these comments. Was she saying it in future tense, as in "you will love it"... "it is delicious"..... perhaps she was "telling" you to love it ,whether you did or not :-)
Sounded yummy though. I might have to stuff some cabbage rolls myself, sometime soon!
Posted by: Sandy Maberly | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 04:22 PM
Sandy, thanks for asking about those statements. I should (but wont have the time) go on about Martine, who was such a confident yet unpretentious person. Though it may seem pretentious to say it is good, isnt it? You like it, dont you? for Martine, these were more insights into her enthusiasm for life. So, yes, these exclamations were made in the present, sort of like Its a good life, isnt it?!
Posted by: Kristin Espinasse | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 04:29 PM
In the description of Martine (in the sixth paragraph), I wouldn't put a comma between "make-up" and "heavy."
It's a wonderful character profile!
Posted by: Bonny | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 04:36 PM
Yes, I, too, wondered about "make-up, heavy, her figure...". What was "heavy"? Her make-up or her figure?
Posted by: mhwebb | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 06:28 PM
...glove compartment, from which she produced...
Posted by: Allen Laskin | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 07:08 PM
Hi Kristin,
I'd like to offer some little changes.
In the second sentence of paragraph 3 I think "She brought strawberries for the children.." would sound better.
Like other your readers, I also have doubts about the description of your friend. Id write it like this"... her hair was bleached light, her make-up heavy,and figure,which she decorated with pride, was something in between." Anyway, it needs some polish.
In the last paragraph I'd change "past me' to "passing me".
The main thing is, that, in my opinion, the story needs one final sentence to finish it. For example, what she started to read from those papers.
Have a great day,
Olga.
Posted by: Olga Brown | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 07:26 PM
In the sentence "when personal doubts had begun to consume me" can you add something to make a more definitive picture of what doubts you had. Why did you have doubts about being a wife and mother? Doubts about your ability to handle it all while JM traveled for work? Doubts about this foreign life you chose?
And a content-related question: how did you meet Martine? Can you say it in one or two sentences?
Posted by: Julie F in St. Louis, MO | Monday, November 21, 2011 at 11:28 PM
Hey, Kristin –
Consider putting “I know you’re in there. Come out, come out!” in italics or inside quotes.
I’m not clear on why knowing J-M was away a lot would prompt her to close the shutters, but I guess it doesn’t really matter.
Consider a comma after the introductory “At the time.”
I kind of assumed Martine was saying, “It’s good” and “You love it” while you were eating the cabbage, so the tense makes sense.
Consider a comma after the introductory “While I ate.”
“Reorganize” is not hyphenated.
Does tapenade count as a condiment?
Most style books call for spelling out the numbers from one to nine, and therefore, “five-foot frame,” but it’s a style choice, not a rule.
I’m guessing her tooth wasn’t bent in front, but that one of her front teeth was bent. The way to say that would be:
“Her teeth, one in front slightly and charmingly bent over the other, were always …”
You need a comma after “were always showing,” because what follows “because” is a complete sentence.
Posted by: Bruce T. Paddock | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 01:45 AM
As it’s written now, you’re saying her hair was Italian and had a dark complexion. I’d suggest:
She was Italian with a dark complexion, her hair bleached…
If you don’t do that, note that there’s an extra space between “was” and “bleached.”
“Makeup,” in the sense that you’re using here, is not hyphenated.
You should probably drop the comma between “makeup” and “heavy.” It’s not required, and in this sentence it’s confusing.
Consider setting off “which she decorated with pride” with em dashes rather than commas. Eliminating the comma after “makeup” will help make the structure of the sentence clearer, but you may want to go further by replacing these two as well.
If you put “Come out, come out!” in the first paragraph in italics, you should do it here as well. If you put “Come out, come out!” in the first paragraph inside quotes, you probably shouldn’t do it here. If you did nothing to “Come out, come out!” in the first paragraph, you should do nothing to it here as well.
Given that you were speaking after you got over the bridge, you probably said, “How did you know you weren’t going to hit that rail?” The next sentence can still be in the present tense (“How can you…”), which preserves the universality of the question and her response.
You need a double space between the paragraph with your dialogue (“How do you know….”) and the one with Martine’s (“Ce n’est rien….”).
Oh. Maybe you were still on the bridge when you were speaking. When you said you had recovered from the fright, I assumed that meant the car was no longer edging along the guard rail.
“…reached past me to the glove compartment, where she produced…” is not correct. “…reached past me to the glove compartment, from which she produced…” is correct, but sounds kinda hoity-toity. “…pulled the car over, reached past me to the glove compartment, and produced….” would work.
Posted by: Bruce T. Paddock | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 01:46 AM
I probably wouldn't put a period after 'shrieked'
-- "......that I shrieked. "Martine!" Love this story!
Posted by: Judi Miller | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 03:47 AM
Well written! This story makes me love Martine without even having to meet her! What a blessing she must have been to you!
Posted by: Jackie Smith | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 07:32 AM
A little nervous here, as I have added some information to the third-to-last paragraph. Please let me know if this reads smoothly and if the punctuation is okay. Thanks for everything!
On Mon, Nov 21, 2011 at 4:29 PM, Kristin Espinasse [email protected] wrote:
Sandy, thanks for asking about those statements. I should (but wont have the time) go on about Martine, who was such a confident yet unpretentious person. Though it may seem pretentious to say it is good, isnt it? You like it, dont you? for Martine, these were more insights into her enthusiasm for life. So, yes, these exclamations were made in the present, sort of like Its a good life, isnt it?!
Posted by: Kristin Espinasse | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 09:50 AM
Update: I have also added a sentence to paragraph 2 (about locking up the shutters). I hope this adds to the story, or at least clarifies why Martine had stopped by. If anyone is reading, please let me know.
Thanks!
On Mon, Nov 21, 2011 at 4:29 PM, Kristin Espinasse [email protected] wrote:
Sandy, thanks for asking about those statements. I should (but wont have the time) go on about Martine, who was such a confident yet unpretentious person. Though it may seem pretentious to say it is good, isnt it? You like it, dont you? for Martine, these were more insights into her enthusiasm for life. So, yes, these exclamations were made in the present, sort of like Its a good life, isnt it?!
Posted by: Kristin Espinasse | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 10:12 AM
Both additions work very well.
The comma after "for the night" makes it seem as though the villagers "needed a reminder." Dropping the comma will make it clearer that the villagers "lock up their windows."
The new third-to-last paragraph implies that you were clutching the metaphorical guardrail for support or protection, which is probably what you meant. But given that Martine was ignoring, not holding onto, the real guardrail, I just wanted to check.
Posted by: Bruce T. Paddock | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 02:34 PM
Kristin,
Now it flows much smoother.
As the matter of a fact, first I wanted to offer you a similar variant: "Italian, with a dark complexion, she had her hair bleached light,..." So, whatever sounds better for you...
In the added paragraph I am not sure if it should be "let go of.." or "let go off". You can check.
In general, the story is very dynamic, runs smooth and I like it.
Amicalement,
Olga.
P.S. Hope, this comment will come through.
Posted by: Olga Brown | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 07:50 PM
Another great story. Just two minor things: in the vocab, I suggest writing "sois confiant(e)" to emphasise the need to agree, and as a tiny point, isn't there more than one farmer at the market? (i.e. farmers')
Looks good to go otherwise!
Posted by: Nigel | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 11:25 PM
Hi Kristin,
I am no help at all because I am enjoying reading the stories and I don't notice any of the mistakes other people are seeing! Sorry!
Posted by: Eileen deCamp | Tuesday, November 22, 2011 at 11:57 PM
Many thanks, Nigel, for these excellent edits!
Posted by: Kristin Espinasse | Thursday, November 24, 2011 at 12:10 PM