plein d'entrain
Video for Aunt Liddy!

pourboire: How to say tip in French

Susan Boehnstedt aka Rouge-Bleu (c) Kristin Espinasse
Today, in the US, it's Le Jour de Merci Donnant and I'm busy giving thanks for the people in my life, including YOU and Rouge-Bleu. Read more about my high-school chum in today's story. Note: you haven't heard much about Susan, over the years--that's because I haven't had the chance to see her much. I do have a funny photo, near the end of this post, taken on one of those rare visits, in 2007...

 

pourboire (por-bwar)

    : tip

Audio File: Listen to Jean-Marc read the following example sentence in French (note: enjoy the uncut version, in which you'll hear Jean-Marc's reaction to the mile-long example sentence I've selected. Listen closely as he teases, "oh, they're gonna like this one!... Oh, ça va leur plair celui-là! I did leave out my laughter, at the beginning of the recording, and had to beg my husband to please quit the tickling, it's time to get to work!): Download MP3 or Wav file

Le pourboire. En France, cette pratique s'est développée plus tard, au 19ème siècle, pour récompenser les cafetiers et restaurateurs d'un service de qualité. Le pourboire signifiait comme son nom l'indique un verre qu'on offrait en remerciement d'un service rendu... The tipIn France this practice was developed later, in the 19th-century, to compensate café-owners and restaurateurs for quality service. Le pourboire signifies, as its name indicates ("pour boire", or "for drink") a glass (drink) offered in thanks for a service rendered... (from Internaute.com, Les origines du pourboire)


A Day in a French Life... by Kristin Espinasse

...Continued from the previous post "Plein d'Entrain")...

When the tour bus rolled up to the dock, where our AMA cruise boat waited, I noticed my best friend and travelling companion reach for her porte-monnaie. Quickly, I mimicked Susan's gestures, as I would throughout the voyage, to ensure my behavior was in line with the other tourists', none of whom appeared nervous, awkward, or conspicuous.

Only, as I reached for my own portefeuille, I ran into an embarrassing pépin. Among all the loose change there was only one large coin. The rest were those itty-bitty yellow ones—les pièces jaunes my husband gives the gitans who instantly appear at city stop lights, brandishing water bottles and squeegees.  After they've doused our windshield with sudsy water, one feels obliged to thank them for it. But when my husband hands over the loose change from our cendrier —mostly pennies, twenty French cents worth—I want to hide inside the glove compartment. Manque d'espace! 

Back in the tourist bus, staring into my change-purse, I was tormented by visions of a tour guide throwing pennies back at me, just as some of the gitans had done, so offended were they by what was judged une insulte.

As I fingered the change, counting and recounting the coins, my best friend became aware of my fixation. "Everything alright, Rouge-Bleu*?" she inquired.

Completely absorbed by the contents of my change-purse, I was barely aware of answering. "I only have yellow coins for the second tour guide, "I murmured. "I've got a 2-euro coin for the first guide... but I can't find another two-euro coin to offer the second guide."

Like a broken record, I couldn't seem to change tracts. My thoughts were repeating and repeating, ....no 2-euro coins... what will I do?... no two euro coins... what will I do?

"But you have enough," Susan assured me, pointing out that all the yellow coins added up to two euros.

"Yes, I know, but I can't hand over so much loose change!" The broken record in my mind continued ...no 2-euro coins... what will I do?... no two euro coins... what will I do?

"Why not?" Susan was intrigued.

Was it fierté? I didn't want to be the tourist handing over the pennies, never mind the pennies added up to two euros! I'd be seen as one of those oursins-dans-la-poche types. A real cheapskate!

"And besides," I explained, trying to downplay the pride—by highlighting my thoughtful side—"if everyone gave the lady twenty coins (of ten centimes), that tour guide would be painfully weighed down. Just how would she and her heavy poches climb onto the metro for the ride home?"

Susan shook her head and smiled. "Rouge-Bleu, don't be silly. You have enough money—denomination doesn't matter!"

I nodded my head. Susan was right. Still, I couldn't help but stare into my purse willing a two-euro coin to appear. No matter how many times I ran my fingers through the centimes, turning them, I couldn't uncover a might-be-hidden-somewhere 2-euro coin.

Noticing the obsessive behavior, Susan put a stop to it in her usual discreet manner. "Look here, Rouge-Bleu," she said, holding up a prized 2-euro coin of her own.

I unglued my eyes from my change-purse, with it's bottomless pit of pennies, to discover my pal's proposition.

"I'll trade ya!" she said, "One of these for all of those."

It only took a thoughtful instant to be released from so much torture. Merci ma chère Rouge-Bleu.

 ***

Post note, as we walked off the bus and it came time to tip the tour guide, I did so with assurance. I was so relieved to have a big coin to give her, and not a handful of embarrassing pennies. ...Until it occured to me that Susan was about to pay for my freedom!

As she approached the tour guide, I studied my dear friend, as I would throughout the trip, mimicking her every gesture. I still had so much to learn.

How graceful she was as she thanked the guide, pausing to drop those pennies into her palm in one sincere shower of thanks.

French Vocabulary

la porte-monnaie = coin-purse
le portefeuille = wallet
pépin = snag, hitch (pépin has another meaning. Read the story here)
les pièces jaunes = pennies
le gitan = gypsy 
le cendrier = ashtray
manque d'espace! = but for the lack of room!
la fierté = pride
avoir les oursins dans la poche = to have sea urchins in one's pockets (making it hard to reach for one's money...), ie, to be a cheapskate, skinflint, pinchpenny
une poche = pocket
merci ma chère Rouge-Bleu = thank you my dear Rouge-Bleu 

*Rouge-Bleu is the name my best friend and I call each other, after coming up with the moniker back in highschool. Susan had an after-school job in cosmetics (Lancome) and we enjoyed trying on all the make-up! When we discovered a lipstick called Rouge-Bleu, we couldn't pronounce the French word without dissolving into laughter. I still have trouble pronouncing it.

You may also recognize the name from our wine labels... Jean-Marc liked it so much he borrowed it! But the original Rouge-Bleu is my dear friend of 30 years. 

 

Rouge-bleu kristi susan

Susan, aka Rouge-Bleu, came to visit after our first harvest, in 2007. Though the harvest was over, Jean-Marc managed to find another field to glean. I'm wearing red--trying to stand out like a beacon lest the hunters (with whom we shared the field) mistake the harvesters, or vendengers, for venison! To comment on any item in this post, click here.

DSC_0353
Now to tempt you to come to France... if you need assistance with airline tickets or hotel reservations, please contact Susan. She is the most devoted travel agent. 


DSC_0359
You can email her at [email protected] or call her at 480-831-9076.

Fall in Avignong (c) Kristin Espinasse
Meantime, keep thinking of your next visit... and you will be here soon! (photo taken in Avignon)

 

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For more online reading: The Lost Gardens: A Story of Two Vineyards and a Sobriety

Comments

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Marika Ujvari

Happy Thanksgiving to you, Kristi! What is the name of the hillside village in today's posting?? It is beautiful!!

Jeanne in Oregon

Happy Thanksgiving dear Kristin.

Your message today reminds me of the loveliest tipping ritual I've ever heard of. As you know, the Bible tells Christians to share the Gospel (Good News) with all the world. However, doing so is often considered not politically correct. My friend Ceil has solved this dilemma by tucking a nice tip inside a Gospel tract, then handing it, along with a warm smile and a cheerful "God bless you", to the service provider.

Wishing you and yours a blessed day and great happiness as you enter the Christmas season in your lovely new home.

Jeanne in Oregon

Cheryl in STL

Happy Thanksgiving, Kristin! What a special treasure a childhood best friend is! I just spent 3 days last week with mine---we aren't separated by an ocean, but by several states. I love the Rouge-Bleu nicknames and the origin of the name of the vineyard! Little did Lancôme know.....

Debbie

Here in Canada, we call it "L'Action de Grace" (circonflex over the a in Grace, darn MacBook won't add it). Enjoy the day and I am thankful to read French-word-a-day!

mary

Hi Kristin, I love this post---I also can get "stuck" on the silliest of moments. Sending love for a great French Thanksgiving Day.
Mary

Tammy

Many thanks to you as well - although our thanksgiving was in October - au Canada we use the phrase ...une très heureuse Action de grâces

Jacqueline Satterlee

My most embarrassing tipping experience:

I wanted to see the film West Side Story. This was in the 60's, i was in my teens. So I took the Metro to the Champs-Elysées, where movies played in V.O. ( version originale). I payed for my ticket and went in. The film had already started so the "ouvreuse" took me to a seat with the aid of a flash light, as it was pitch dark. When we got there i realized I only had a huge bill left in my wallet, so I just thanked her and sat down, hoping she would not make a fuss about not tipping her. Wrong! " mademoiselle, c'est comme ça que je gagne ma vie" , etc... How do you think i make a living? I was so embarrassed, i went back to the "caisse" and broke the bill into petite monnaie, so I could tip her. (At least that way I imagine i was able to buy a Cornexqui or Esquimo icecream when she came around at intermission with her basket of goodies... Or maybe not...:-)

Janet smajstrla

I think I recognize Les Baux in the first photo-a truly enchanting village perched on the side of a cliff. Did you go in the quarry and see the slide shows? It was quite inspired. I was also mesmerized By the homes built into the bottom of the cliff walls. Thanks, this one brought back great memories.

Eileen - Charlottesville, VA

Hi Kristi,
We are thankful for you and FWAD. Thanks for the lovely photos and the great stories! I may have to call Susan to arrange a trip to France now that my daughter will be studying for a semester not too far from you!

Stacy ~ Sweet Life Farm ~ Applegate, Oregon

Thankful for you dear friend and your beautiful way of being. I have enjoyed all the stories about your cruise --- and yes, you’ve tempted me to consider one! We were together in my dream the other night; I was telling you how much I enjoy reading FWAD. I let you know I always read your posts and when I don’t comment, usually it is because of my computer’s noncompliance with my wish… For some reason it does not bring up the comment box!? It did today, so I will grab this chance to say thank you from the bottom of this grateful heart.

“A friend might well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.”
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Marianne Rankin

I have never heard of "Merci Donnant" used anywhere, unless it's something new. When I studied French, we were told that Thanksgiving is "le Jour d'Actions de Graces." Is Thanksgiving observed at all in France? I didn't think so, unless it's something the French have picked up from Americans in recent years.

I apologize for not commenting for a few weeks or so, as I've been tied up with other things. I've read all of the posts and some of the comments.

I wanted to say specifically that I am SO happy that there are still some FWADs. I understand how in different periods of one's life, circumstances may make a regular blog or e-letter impossible. I am happy to receive the FWAD whenever one is available, and thank you, Kristin, for continuing to send them, on whatever "schedule" is convenient for you.

As I understand it, you sold the Rouge-Bleu vineyard to your friends - it really was a lot of work to be done by just a few people, especially Jean-Marc. But then no sooner do you arrive in Bandol, and he begins more wine ventures - or should I say "adventures"? Exactly what is/will be his "job"? A bit of this and a bit of that? Should be interesting if you can make it work. I'm sure the move was difficult in many respects, and I've been praying for the family, including adjusting to a new neighborhood, new schools, etc. I was so relieved to learn that the "big news" wasn't something negative, but a change of direction that can lead to a new chapter in your lives.

I look forward to getting back on track by offering remarks here and there.

I suppose that J-M will not be coming on wine-promoting trips as he has in the past. If any or all of you get to the D.C. area, please look me up. I'd love to visit France again, and will keep Susan in mind, but I have to save my pennies (of the copper variety) for a few more years.

If you are having a family Thanksgiving, I hope it is a most enjoyable one. Wishing you health and happiness always.

Cynthia Lewis in Salisbury, Eastern Shore of Maryland

HAPPY THANKSGIVING to all of the Espinasse family.....even if it isn't a French holiday! Thanks so much for today's FWAD; it was/is most entertaining. I am so glad that you had a wonderful trip with your best friend, Susan.

Natalia

Hi dear Kristin,
Oh, WOW! Love these pictures! Don't know which steals my heart more--that incredible one at the end -- the tree draped in glorious foliage,or...the first one of beautiful you,giving thanks. Dear Friend, it is we who give thanks for you and each wonderful post! Always a bright light (even if the day isn't gloomy).Remember that Proverb(think it's 25),"A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver"? That is YOU!
Your lovely Susan, and your friendship, is a gift to be cherished. My own oldest friend, (a second sister ,really) is Sally,with whom I been graced with for more than 60 years.
Today is Thanksgiving here in the US, and gives us pause to praise God --for family, for loved ones, and for friends like the Espinasse 's and all of our extended FWAD members.
How blessed we are.
Love, Natalia XO

Millie

Whether you celebrate it or not, Happy Thanksgiving, Kristin!
Today's post lets me see that we are so alike. Reading it gave me the impression you were describing my feelings! My husband is like your Rouge-Bleu Susan, with confidence.

Espace n'a pas d'accent aigu sur le premier E.

Bill Facker

Kristin, JM, & Family (AND JULES!) As we come to the beginning of the Holidays (Happy Thanksgiving) and the end of the year, I want to Thank You very much (Mahalo Nui Loa) for the continued sharing of your personal daily activities with all of us. Kristin, because of your extraordinary efforts, you and your family have truly become one with many, many other families who are grateful to have you in their lives. I am among them .. so appreciative of your gifts, talents, and hard work. Thank You & Enjoy Your Day!!! Aloha, Bill Facker

Karene

Dear Kristin, I have only a quick moment to comment, as I am preparing Thanksgiving dinner here in California. I didn't even have time to read your whole post, only the captions with the pictures. But I just have to wish you a wonderful Thanksgiving, and to say how thankful I am that I discovered you and your blog. I AM dreaming of coming to France, and how wonderful to know about your friend Susan. I don't know when our family can manage it, but hopefully before Susan retires! In the meantime, I will continue to read your posts and books :) Thank you for sharing your life so authentically!

Betty

Happy Thanksgiving! You and your whole family are in my thoughts & prayers daily, however it is always nice to set aside a special time to say thank you for the many ways you have impacted my life.
First, my sister & friends were planning a trip to France when I happened on your blog while trying to refresh my college french. Our plans changed & we went to Italy where my limited language skills were of no use as no one knew the directions to any place I asked about.
Secondly, I stayed for the your writing & photography skills. I just love your vignettes both written & pictoral. I JUST LOVE TODAY'S DOOR!!!
Third, pictures of Lily float across my screensaver & my heat melts once more. As I said at the time, I wanted that caring person (you) to be my friend.
Fourth, you totally caught me up in the vortex of your creation which turned out to be BLOSSOMING IN PROVENCE. It was good to feel part of something that had worldwide collaboration & turned out so well.
Fifth, you are now family of the heart.

Someday soon I will make it to France & hope to be able to thank you in person for all you (& JULES) have added to my life.

Sarah LaBelle near Chicago

Learned something new about Canada, pour le jour de l'Action de grâce.

http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Action_de_gr%C3%A2ce_%28Thanksgiving%29

There, it is marked in October.

It is hard to imagine you frozen by pride, not having what you deem to be the right denomination of euro coins for a tip! Glad your friend was there to redirect your focus to the moment, and melt your indecision into action. In my life of no travel, I have not had to think of tips in ages. Only the simple ones at a restaurant now and then.

Kristin Espinasse

Marianne, so good to see you back. I was beginning to worry about you! Re Merci donnant, this term refers to a famous article written by Art Buckwald (click on the term to be taken to the article). It is not correct French, but it is a funny try at translation. You mentioned Jean-Marcs new project... just a heads-up: you can follow his wine-making journey here, at his new blog: http://a-la-recherche-du-vin.typepad.com/mas-des-brun 

Thank you all for the warm and lovely comments. Im not doing well answering them, but it is such a pleasure to read every word you write. Thanks so much for the reminder about what is, exactly, the spirit of Thanksgiving. Again, I am so grateful for this community, or, as reader, Herm, puts it this French word family. P.S. please keep Herm in your thoughts, as he will soon undergo by-pass surgery.

Bill Facker

Good thoughts and a prayer for you, Herm. Aloha and Hang in there! Bill Facker

barbara michels

In 1986 we took a canal boat trip down the "Canal du Midi" on the Luciole. Imagine my surprise when a few weeks ago, reading France Magazine, there, in an article about river/canal cruising, a random photo showed our "Luciole". It is a beautiful way to see France slowly, one village at a time. Thanks for the memories.

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