FRENCH WORD-A-DAY

I once thought giving up alcohol would make dining out less enjoyable—how could I savor a meal without a glass of wine? But with so many delicious things to eat and to see, I don't miss drinking. Just look at this charming pup and the inviting French menu. Life is full and vibrant on the other side. More in today’s story!

TODAY'S WORD: LE TÉMOIGNAGE

    : testimony, personal account

A DAY IN A FRENCH LIFE by Kristi Espinasse

February 3rd, 2025—Twenty-two years ago today, I made the decision to quit drinking. I had just turned 35.

We lived in the medieval village of Les Arcs-sur-Argens, in le Quartier de La Garrigue, on a quiet lot at the base of a forest. From our living room you could see la piscine where our kids loved to swim and a few rows of vines Jean-Marc had planted—the beginning of his dream to make wine. The day I became sober, we had no idea that two vineyards and thousands of gallons of wine were in our future.

I remember the cream-colored velour canapé where my husband and I sat side by side that early morning. The kids were asleep in the rooms down the hall. Steam rose from our coffee cups, and the house was so quiet you could hear our heartbeats. The last time our hearts had pounded this loudly was on our wedding day, nine years earlier. I had been just as scared then as I was now, facing another lifelong commitment.

Setting down his coffee, Jean-Marc turned to me. “Je pense que tu dois arrêter.” (I think you need to stop.)

I wiped my tears away, but more came pouring out. I wasn’t sad about quitting, I was relieved, soulagé (interesting how the word soûl or “drunk” is part of the word soulager, “to relieve”). I was relieved to be done with alcohol, and I could now see how I had used it as a relief from everything from social anxiety to procrastination—or facing the challenges of living.

I may not have been un accro at that point along life’s trajectory, but my social blunders were accumulating and I was waking up with more and more regrets. My family and friends did not think I was an alcoholic, only that I could not handle alcohol—whether it was wine, beer, or vodka.

Vodka. I leaned back, remembering the Christmas gift from weeks earlier. At the Swedish-owned vineyard where I worked, we were all given bottles of Stoli. I brought mine home and slid it in the congélateur. In the evenings, after the kids went to bed, I would pour myself a shot and sit in front of a blank page. My dream was to be a writer, but an invisible barrier seemed to stand in my way.

The Swedish team had also given us pajamas in cornflower blue—soft, elegant, and comforting. I wore them at home after work, sipping vodka at my desk. One shot became two, a new ritual, just as wine had become a ritual when I moved to France and, before that, beer. It was an engrenage—a slow, insidious trap tightening its hold on me.

I might have quit drinking as a teenager, after my first blackout. But it wasn’t in the cards—or in the stars. Heaven alone knows our steps and our missteps, but one thing is clear to me now: when there is a giant boulder on the path, it takes a supernatural strength to remove it. The day I made the decision to quit, the desire to drink was lifted right out of me. I know it was the hand of God.

That morning, sitting on the couch beside Jean-Marc, something shifted—a déclic. My intellect told me dark clouds were ahead if I continued down this road. My heart and mind told me I needed help and could not do this alone. By God’s grace, I stepped off that dead-end road and, little by little, found an inébranlable peace. Life’s challenges and anxieties don’t suddenly disappear when you make a positive change, but positive changes are like muscles, helping us to carry life’s load instead of bending beneath it. 

Twenty-two years ago today, I said adieu to alcohol. Not everybody understands my decision but I do and I have never looked back—except to share my story, day after day, when I wake up to face this blank page. That invisible, insidious barrier has been lifted, entirely taken away. And but for the grace of God go I.

"Addiction is giving up everything for one thing. Recovery is giving up one thing for everything." 
--Anonymous
L'addiction, c'est tout abandonner pour une seule chose. La guérison, c'est abandonner une seule chose pour tout retrouver.

Ceci est mon témoignage. This is my personal account. I hope it speaks to you. Whether you are thinking of quitting alcohol or cigarettes or gossip—whatever the insidious habit—face the blank page and begin to write your own future, the way you imagine it in your heart, your mind, and your dreams. Je vous assure, it is a story worth telling. 💗

Back then...I'm the tipsy one wearing the party ribbons

And now: on a hike with Ana, Max, and their dogs.

COMMENTS
To leave a comment or a correction, please click here.

FRENCH VOCABULARY 

Click here to listen to Jean-Marc pronounce the French words

le témoignage = testimony, personal account

la piscine = pool 

le quartier = neighborhood 

la garrigue = wild Mediterranean scrubland

le canapé = sofa, couch

je pense que tu dois arrêter = I think you need to stop

soûl (saoul) = drunk 

soûler (saouler) = to get drunk

soulager = to ease, relieve

un accro = an addict, someone dependent on something

Stoli (Stolichnaya) = a brand of vodka  

le congélateur = freezer

l’engrenage (m) = spiral, cycle

le déclic = aha moment

inébranlable = unflappable

adieu = good bye forever

ceci est mon témoignage = this is my personal story

je vous assure = assure you 

A TEAM AND TOURS THAT MAKE A DIFFERENCE 

Bonjour!

As a France-based company, we at Tour With Absolutely offer an insider’s perspective on small-group tours designed exclusively for women, showcasing the very best of France.

Our expert hosts—an extraordinary mix of Canadian, American, and Australian best-selling authors, influential bloggers, renowned chefs, talented photographers, gifted artists, and skilled craftswomen—bring each destination to life with their passion and expertise.

From intimate literary salons in Paris and hands-on artisan workshops in Provence to coastal discoveries in the Basque Country and vibrant market strolls along the Riviera, our thoughtfully curated journeys celebrate the creativity, heritage, and artistry of remarkable women. Join us for an unforgettable adventure, where authentic experiences and meaningful connections await. 100 euro discount code French100

Contact [email protected]

REMERCIEMENTS
Heartfelt thanks to the readers who contributed after my last post. Your support means so much and helps keep this journal alive and thriving—I couldn’t do it without you!

Jo H.
Norman S.
Yvonne W.

Back here in La Ciotat, the mimosa is in bloom. I've been enjoying lots of hikes. This one with Jackie and Ricci.

On February 4th, we also saw the first coquelicot, or poppy, of the season! I meant to photograph it in the field, alongside the road, but when we returned from our hike it was gone. We spotted it on the ground further down the road. "A little kid must have picked it," Jackie said, reaching for it. That's how it ended up in Ricci's fur, and she is being very patient for this photo even if it's not her best.